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Just The Sports: Not Sports-Related

Just The Sports

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Not Sports-Related

Today there is really nothing I want to write about sports-related so going back to my college roots, where I wrote satirical articles for a magazine, I have decided to pen one, inspired by the death of Crocodile Hunter Steve Irwin and the obligatory sentiment of, "at least he died doing what he loved," which got me thinking about why we don't apply that logic to other deaths. Well, I did. Hope you enjoy.

Heroin Addict Dies Doing What She Loved

The death of twenty four year old Lauren Metzger by drug overdose shocked no one in the small community of Bladenboro, North Carolina. Her drug exploits were much discussed by the residents, sometimes to the ridicule of Metzger, though always with a tinge of respect.

Metzger, before her untimely demise, was one of the most knowledgeable experts on illicit drugs in the area, able to counsel those who were just getting into drugs and inform them which dealers could be trusted and how best to avoid compromising the sterility of needles. At the age of fourteen, Metzger smoked her first marijuana joint and quickly gatewayed into ecstasy, cocaine, and LSD before finally settling on heroin. It is this drug she became best known for.

"If I were to asked to describe Lauren in one way, I would say it was her deep, unabashed love for heroin," brother, Paul, said. "A lot of drug addicts simply pay lip service to the drugs they abuse, but Lauren was so genuine in her drug use. Heroin wasn't just a drug she did; heroin was who she was. Even when her veins collapsed, Lauren didn't let that deter her. That's just the type of addict she was."

Friend Lisa Pope, who was with Lauren when she OD'd, expressed similar sentiments when talking of Metzger. "After freaking out and rushing about and finally finding the phone to call the ambulance, I was just shocked that this sort of thing could happen to Lauren," she said. "We both knew the risks involved, but silly as it sounds, I thought Lauren would live forever as a heroin addict. She just seemed so invincible. I know I'll never forget her and the heroin lessons she gave me."

The Metzger family plans to establish a foundation for other heroin addicts who need a place to come together and share their love of heroin.


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