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Just The Sports: 2006-03-12

Just The Sports

Saturday, March 18, 2006

Tournament Running Diary

Some of you have probably wondered to yourself or aloud what thoughts go running through my head when I'm watching a sporting event. Well, you are about to find out. Enjoy.

Duke vs. George Washington

1:18-Duke is up 11-7 as George Washington absolutely refuses to play transition D.

1:21-I know this has been said many times before, but Shelden Williams is one ugly motherfucker.

1:22-Pops Mensah-Bonsu (GW) throws down an amazing alley oop. Unfortunately, dunks are still only worth 2 points, a rule that seems a little outdated when you think about it. Dunks should be worth at least 4 points if not more for one reason. Not everyone can dunk, but if you give a basketball player enough tries, he will eventually hit a 3 pointer, which makes shooting a 3 pointer easier than dunking. Just a thought. Duke 15, GW 12.

1:25-Shelden Williams' success as a basketball player continues to astound me. He really has no discernible post moves.

1:27-JJ Redick misses two free throws as his free throw percentage continues to decrease. It is still respectable (88%), but he is not as automatic from the stripe as commentators would have you believe. Duke 15, GW 14.

1:31-A men's deodorant commercial that objectifies women's body parts. I'm not sure what a woman's ass or stomach has to do Old Spice, but apparently they have more in common than I thought.

1:32-Melchionni hits a mid-range jumper to remind me that yes, he is still on the roster. GW quickly answers. Duke 17, GW 16.

1:33-Carl Hobbs, GW's head coach, is wearing a dress shirt with sleeves that are too big for his arms. He looks foolish. GW is destined to lose.

1:36-Melchionni hits one 3, thinks he's on fire, and takes an ill-advised pull-up 3 on a fast break. Melchionni clearly fouls Omar Williams, but no call is made. Duke 20, GW 16.

1:41-Note to GW's post players: Shelden Williams has no left hand. Duke 24, GW 18.

1:42-Redick hits a 3 from the corner. Duke 27, GW 18. Hobbs's poofy sleeves are doing more damage than he can imagine. He'd do himself and his team a favor by finding a dress shirt that fits.

1:48-McRoberts misses a free throw and then gets his own rebound. It's very noticeable when McRoberts thinks he's going to miss a free throw because he races off the line to get the rebound. It might help if GW blocks out the free throw shooter, too. Duke 29, GW 20.

1:50-My bad. Shelden Williams does have a left hand. Duke 32, GW 20.

1:51-Duke 34, GW 20. So much for Duke having problems with long, athletic teams.

1:54-Redick picks up his secound foul with 5 minutes left in the first half. We may not see him again in the first half. Where's the offense going to come from now? Not from Dockery who just had his shot blocked.

1:55-Greg Paulus calls a timeout while falling out of bounds. There really needs to be a rule to stop that sort of thing. Now I have to sit through another bad commercial. Thanks a lot, Paulus.

2:00-Redick is back, once again proving me wrong. Maybe I shouldn't be a coach after all. You can still be wrong as a commentator, though, since no one is going to hold you accountable. Duke 36, GW 22.

2:01-Needless diving on the court leads to GW gaining possession.

2:02-Dockery turns the ball over and then does what everyone does after committing a turnover. He fouls someone. Koundija hits 1 of 2 free throws to make it Duke 36, GW 25.

2:04-Paulus throws a pass to someone in the stands.

2:05-Omar Williams drives to the basket and is fouled by Shelden Williams, his second foul. He is quickly taken out of the game for the last 48 seconds. Williams hits 1 of 2. Duke 37, GW 26.

2:06-Melchionni blocked a shot? Game over. They shouldn't even come out for the second half. End of first half score: Duke 37, GW 26.

2:29-GW starts the second half by committing a turnover. Very impressive start for the Colonials.

2:30-Dockery hits a 3. Duke 40, GW 26.

2:30-Two wasted fast breaks later, the score remains the same. Redick hits a 3. Duke 43, GW 26. Hobbs did not change his dress shirt.

2:31-Shelden blocks Pops Mensah-Bonsu for his fifth block of the day. GW manages to score. Duke 43, GW 30.

2:32-Redick hits a jumper to increase the Duke lead to 17.

2:33-If GW's not going to play transition defense, they should alert the NCAA officials now so they can call the game in favor of Duke.

2:35-McRobert's beautiful pass to Redick cutting to the basket leads to a chance for a 3-point play. Redick misses another free throw. Not surprising if you've watched him shoot free throws this year. Duke 51, GW 33.

2:36-GW pretends they want to win by hitting a 3. Who thinks GW got slighted by the Tournament Selection Committee now? Duke 51, 36.

2:39-Redick picks up his 3rd foul.

2:41-Danilo Pinnock for GW throws down a monster dunk. Still only counts for two points. Duke 51, GW 38.

2:42-Melchionni misses an easy dunk once again proving my theory that dunks are harder than 3-pointers and should count for more points. For the record, Melchionni is 6'6.

2:44-Melchionni shoots an airball and is immediately taken out of the game. It is now safe for children to watch again. Duke 51, GW 40.

2:45-Pinnock steals a pass, which leads to another dunk. Duke 51, GW 42.

2:49-Duke continues to miss free throws as Dockery makes 1 of 2. Duke 52, GW 42.

2:50-Another 3 for Redick and for Duke. Duke 55, GW 42.

2:52-McRoberts is a great passer. 10 minutes left in the game.

2:54-What a game by Pops Mensah-Bonsu so for. 4 points, 2 rebounds, 3 fouls. People kill for that kind of stat line. Kill themselves, that is.

3:02-Dan Bonner just said he didn't think Shelden Williams had scored in the second half, a mere minute or so after Shelden hit 2 free throws. Way to pay attention, Dan.

3:09-Five minutes left in the game. Duke 63, GW 47.

3:20-Duke wins.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

President Bush Reveals His True Colors

A nice gesture, but it does raise an important question. Did President Bush meet with Jason McElwain because he is also autistic? I wonder.